You’ve been flirting online for some time and she finally agreed to go on a real date with you. The table is booked at her favourite restaurant. All you have to do is show up. And make interesting conversation. That’s right. The conversation must be kept going at all cost to avoid those awkward silences that so often spoil a first date. Take our advice for a successful first date where neither you nor your partner are at a loss for words.

# Acknowledge the Awkwardness

Instead of blurting out the first thing that comes to mind when an awkward silence develops, acknowledge it for what it is. Don’t panic and get “stuck in your head”. Smile at your partner over the table and say: “Isn’t that nice, an awkward silence.” This will make her laugh and hopefully make the tension disappear. Then take a sip of wine and breath deeply before trying one of our conversation making tips.

# Do your Homework

Before setting off on your date, make sure you know as much as possible about her hobbies and interests. You would have had ample time to do this if you met online. Now use your best google search skills to note down some interesting facts to impress her with. She will no doubt have an opinion or story of her own to tell. Listen with interest and, without interrupting too soon, follow up with a question that should get her going again.

# Stay Away from Controversial Topics

It’s one thing to ask her about neutral hobbies and interests, but another to question her about religion and politics. Avoid these topics completely unless you know for sure you are on the same page. An awkward silence is due to ensue when you realise your religious beliefs are on opposite sides of the spectrum or back different political parties. Such a silence will be difficult to break, but you can try: “Let’s not be silenced by religion or politics. It’s a little too early for that, don’t you think?”

# Don’t Talk About Past Relationships

She doesn’t have to know why you broke up with your ex-girlfriend or what her good and bad qualities were. After all, what do you expect her to say? You sure as hell wouldn’t want to know how many hours your date’s ex spent in the gym or that he took her on a romantic trip to Paris. Put these details away for a much later date. In fact, only talk about ex-partners when they become relevant in a long-term relationship.

# Take Cues from your Environment

Comfortably and confidently look around you when she stops speaking and you can’t immediately think of something to say. Comment on something interesting around you. Like the shiny marble floor tiles. “This floor is amazing. I heard the owner is Italian. I wonder whether the marble is from his home in Italy?” If you are tempted to discuss people around you, do so subtly and leave out the snide remarks. You don’t want your date wondering what you are saying about her behind her back.

# Be Active

If you are really worried that you will run out of things to talk about, go on an active date instead of a restaurant where you are table bound. Choose something fun, like watching a comedy show, going tenpin bowling or visiting the local zoo. This will give you more to talk about and something else to focus on when words fail you. When you do sit down for a coffee afterwards you can rate the show, ask her what animal she liked most or discuss your bowling performance.

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